Angry and Hurt

I just spent my shower crying.

I don’t even remember the last time I’ve actually cried. Like, really cried. Not just shedding a few tears, but the runny nose, red and puffy eyes, body shaking cries.

I mean, I almost cried a few weeks ago, but I was in front of people so I pulled it together.

I’m trying not to be because I understand it wasn’t easy for my mom to come to this decision, but I am angry. So angry at her.

We have-had-this dog since I was maybe 12? and anyway, my parents had her put down today. They have three other dogs, all which are inside dogs. My parents brought this dog-Loopy Lucy is-was-her name- inside on the cold nights, but otherwise she was outside. She was a Shepherd mix. Great dog.

I used to take her for walks I got called the dog lady in my town because I was always with her.

I don’t know why they didn’t give her to a no kill shelter (there’s an animal rescue within an hour drive from them) and let her live.

I mean, she could be aggressive, so trying to find her a home would have been difficult, but we could have taken her somewhere.

And her aggressiveness wasn’t her, but it does play a huge role in her being put down.  There are some little kids in their neighborhood who got to start running around the block almost two summers ago. They would get just out of her reach and tease her. And that’s when she got mean.

And what the fuck, they came into her home and teased her, taunted her. I would be fucking pissed and mean to them, too!

I seriously hate kids like them. And at this point I am so fucking pissed I hope one day they tease the wrong dog and it fucking tears them a new one. I know that’s hateful, harsh…how dare I be so cruel. And I’m sorry.

Why don’t parents teach their kids to respect animals? To leave other people’s animals alone? Why don’t they teach their fucking disgusting brats to stay off people’s property.

My dog is dead because she became a threat to those stupid little brats. She became a threat because they fucking made her one. This isn’t about “keeping peace with your neighbor.”

And get this, their dog once attacked my little sister. My sister loves dogs oh so much, and has never teased a dog at all. Their dog just ran up and bit her, tearing her pant leg for no damn reason. My older sister stepped her and chased the dog off. But guess what? They have their dog still. I woulda killed it. And then I would have gone off on them. Secret? Every time I drive up to see my family and that dog runs in front of my car, I don’t even slow down. Because I don’t care if I run it over. There’s a leash law in my town, for one. And two? It attacked my sister.

So yes, I am angry and hurt. I am angry my dog had to die because those kids are not being raised properly. And I hate them. Omg I hate them so much. And I’m so sad I didn’t get to tell her goodbye.

So parents out there, start raising your kids to have some fucking respect. Because God help me, to all the kids out there who tease dogs in their own damn home, I hope you learn what it feels like to be attacked by the dog you provoked for no damn reason.


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