Childhood and Innocence

Oh, where has time gone?

I’m only just barely 23, but I feel old sometimes. Not like old, old, just old. If that makes sense.

Something that you miss.

I miss being a kid with no real worries and responsibilities. I always wanted to grow up because it’d be so cool and fun; I could do whatever I wanted, answer to no one.

I do, sorta, getta do whatever I want. If I can afford it, anyway. Which I typically can’t. I’m not even a college student, but I’m broke. Maybe it’s not just “broke college students”, maybe it’s “broke 20-something year olds”. That seems more accurate to me.

I don’t have to eat vegetables anymore. Which I don’t. Sometimes I eat corn. But I think that’s about it. No more green beans, onions, peas, mushrooms, meatloaf (yes I am aware that’s not just veggies listed).

It is fun, though, being an adult. I get to drive…I love driving. I couldn’t drive til I was 17.

But sometimes I still miss being a kid, playing with dolls with my sisters, or cars with my brothers. Riding my bike and playing cops and rubbers. Putting empty milk gallons on my bike to make a “gas tank”; wearing a poncho I found in the trash and riding my bike through massive water-mud puddles. Wearing goggles as I did so, and covering them in mud so I couldn’t see, and just hope I didn’t ride my bike into a ditch.

I miss the innocence.

Oh, but I did have one worry when I was a kid: swallowing my tongue while I slept. Don’t ask. There were nights I couldn’t sleep, I was so paranoid about that.

But I also like being a grown up. Most days. And I know at the beginning I said I feel old, but that’s not entirely true. Sometimes I feel way younger than 23. It’s weird. But I think people can relate to this feeling…right?

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