Lies My Sisters Told Me

That I foolishly believed.

Not exactly… I was a little kid. And by little, I mean 8 or younger. One is 6 years older than me, the other 4 years. So, obviously, I tended to believe the stuff they told me. And if I didn’t immediately believe, they went on and on and on about how they were right.

Like this one time…

I always wore socks. I literally only took my socks off to change them, and to bathe. It annoyed them, for some unknown reason. So one day, they confront me.

And their words, to the best of my memory, were: “If you wear socks all the time, your feet will get moldy.”

I didn’t immediately believe them. I responded back with I do give my feet fresh air when I change them or take a bath.

No, they told me, that wasn’t enough. They need fresh air over night or they will get moldy

After some time, they finally convinced me. I mean, a part of me always questioned it, but ya know, they were older and wiser.

I don’t remember when exactly, a couple years later maybe, I decided I no longer believed them.

To this day, I still always wear socks. In fact, I just got out of the shower, and immediately put a clean pair of penguin socks on.

I actually can’t sleep without socks. I tried one night- my socks had gotten wet right before bed (damn water on the floor), and just threw them in the laundry, and went to bed. I woke up constantly, my feet icy cold.

When I have sex, my socks stay on. Which is probably better for my partner because the few times I’d wear flip flops during the summer, and obviously, no socks, my feet would be cold. And I can’t imagine cold feet really help the mood. Plus, if my feet are cold, I don’t really enjoy sex.

My feet are always cold. Hence, the socks.

I typically only wear flip flops when I’m going swimming, or when I wear a summer dress, and they just look better with the dress than my tennis shoes.

Oh, and I think feet are gross. So I just prefer to cover my feet. Although, I do have perfect feet…For ya know, being grown up feet. Baby feet are cute. But that’s it.

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