Losing Your Virginity Doesn’t Hurt

I’ve lost count of how many blogs/articles where women writers state that “losing your virginity really doesn’t hurt”, “you don’t bleed”, and that those two things are just made up to scare girls into staying virgins.

Okay, first off, losing my virginity hurt like a bitch. To the point, I cried. But hey, ya know, I guess my pain was completely imagined, and all in my head. That my vagina was sore for two fucking days because I imagined it was suppose to be.

Tell me that I wasn’t fully aroused enough, and that’s what caused it to hurt. Say it. I know these writers who say these statements believe that. But news-flash: I was aroused. I was wet. I wanted him like nothing else.

Sure, I was scared. And I changed my mind (but he didn’t stop). But there was plenty of foreplay involved, and I was aroused. I was horny as fuck.

And I did bleed. Not like a period, but there was blood. I spotted for the next 36 hours or so.

No, not all girls will experience the amount of pain I did when they have sex for the first time. Not all girls will bleed. But I really wish the women saying it doesn’t hurt and you won’t bleed would stop, and actually listen to the women who do experience that.

Just because you didn’t experience pain or bleeding when you gave your virginity away doesn’t mean that pain and bleeding are a myth.

I think it was fourth time I had sex it didn’t hurt at all. The pain wasn’t anything at all like the first time, but there was a little pain at the beginning of the next couple of sex sessions I had.

And there’s that. It’s been building for awhile. Ladies, agree, disagree?



  1. I agree! My first time was horribly painful… and not at all romantic as I had hoped and dreamed it would be. I didn’t bleed, but I think that it might be because I was in gymnastics and dance, and I’ve been told that it’s normal if you don’t bleed your first time if you’re an active kid because your hymen stretches. I think it was very painful for me also because I was really inexperienced. I hadn’t had a lot of foreplay or digital penetration. I’d never even used a tampon before because they hurt too much to put in.

    I go back and forth on it. I was glad that I lost it to someone that I was in love with, but on the other hand, I really should have waited until I was older, at least until I was 18. Sex continued to be painful for me (although not as painful as the first time) until I was 18, and I actually didn’t even start to really enjoy sex until I was 19. I thought there was something wrong with me when I was younger because all the girls who were sexually active seemed to really like it, and I didn’t find it pleasurable at all. I think it just depends on how you’re internally built, and I am small inside. I know some women like well endowed men — I’m NOT one of those women because I am built smaller, and if someone is too big I just don’t get a lot of pleasure out of it, and usually can’t orgasm. I want kids, but the thought of delivering a baby scares the shit out of me. LOL.


    • Ha nope, my first time was not at all romantic. My second time though, was. He was so sweet, gentle, caring- everything it should have been the first time! 😛

      I agree…well endowed men, no. I’m small, too, and too big hurts. My boyfriend is above average, and we can’t even have sex every day because I’m sore after. I asked a doctor about that, and she said no, no matter how much we have sex, it’ll always hurt if his size is too big. I was like great. I can enjoy it, just not two days in a row. Unless I want pain with my sex.

      I know! Delivery terrifies me! And if all goes well, I will be delivering in July. I almost want a C-section just to avoid that. But the idea of being put under is always scary, too.


  2. I suppose the best way to approach this is by simply accepting that everybody is different and reacts differently. I was lucky enough to not have experienced great pain at all. Some discomfort, yes.. but it was fine. I was actually expecting something close to the unbearable probably because of what you’ve said, the vast majority of magazines and so on and so forth are just trying to scare naive and inexperienced girls to stay virgin.


    • Yes! That is the best way to approach it, everyone is different. Unfortunately countless women claim it doesn’t hurt at all, that that’s a myth. It’s not a myth. But intense pain isn’t experienced by every girl either. These writers need to be honest, and admit that just because it didn’t hurt for them, doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt for someone else. And if you wanna convince a girl to stay a virgin, scare her with ideas of incurable STDs. ;P

      Liked by 1 person

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