For My Future Children

And I shall have many of you!

I’m going back to the writing challenge on this one. What are three lessons you want your children to learn from you?

It’s not easy to pinpoint three things- thank heavens it don’t hafta be the top three things. It’s not something I ever really thought about. I mean, growing up I’m always thinking “I won’t do that with my kids” or “I’m going to remember (insert) for when I have kids!”

I know that parenting isn’t easy- kudos to the parents who are actually parents! And I know when I do actually have kids, everything will change. I won’t be perfect, despite everything I’ve gathered into “do’s” and “don’ts”. You can have a list memorized, but once that kid is there…I don’t know. I just can’t imagine an imperfect person can raise someone perfectly. Parents will make mistakes.

useful experience: something that acts as an example, punishment, or warning by teaching something not previously understood or accepted

new or better knowledge: some useful knowledge or sense that results from direct experience

Dear Future Kids

Lesson 1

It’s okay to want to make your own mistakes. I’d like for you to just listen to mine, and avoid them, but I understand the need to do for yourself. You will hear learn from history a lot. And in some cases, yeah. Like, let us not let the Holocaust happen a second time; let us not allow slavery to be legal again.

It’s okay to learn through your own experiences. I’m still going to love you…even if you go out drinking every weekend. Or have sex with an unknown number of partners.

But I want you to know that some things you do, they will cause hurt, pain, regret. If you’re like me, you’ll regret drinking the night before when you’re throwing your guts up the next day.

Some people will tell you to have no regrets because what you did, you wanted to do at that time. But please, don’t believe that bull shit. If you want to kill someone, it doesn’t mean you should. But if you did, you should regret it, despite wanting to do it at the time it occurred.

Experience life for you. Maybe think twice about some things- like drugs, unprotected sex, and driving drunk for examples. But know that even if you don’t do things differently than me, I will still love, mistakes and all.

Lesson 2

Be YOU. Don’t let people dictate who you can be. If you want to read true crime fiction all day and creep everyone out with serial killer facts, do it. Don’t let people make you feel dirty or sick.

If you want to go do something crazy and people laugh at you, don’t let them stop you. You are you, and you are special. Unique. The only you the world will ever have. So be you.

I know sometimes you’ll question who YOU are, and that’s okay. We all do sometimes. If something feels wrong, don’t do it. If you want to do something, but people mock, do it. Fuck them. You gotta be true to you.

Just because everyone else is doing something, doesn’t mean you have to. It’s perfectly fine to go against the grain; go off the beaten path. It’ll make you stronger.

Lesson 3

Nobody is perfect, not me, not you. But as long as you do your best, that’s good enough. It won’t always seem like it some days when your boss is nagging on you or when I tell you to try harder.  If you are doing your utter best, don’t sweat the boss. If you’re doing your best, tell me. Because I was a kid once, and I know that sometimes we’re lazy and we lie.

You don’t need A+s to make me happy; I need to know you did your best. And if you can’t get your grades up, I’ll know you’re just not learning the material. But give your best, and don’t give up.

Don’t give up, please. Never stop being the best you can be even when others around you are getting by with mediocre work. Don’t be like them, be better. No, you won’t always be rewarded, and sometimes it’ll all just seem quite unfair, but don’t let it stop you. Because at the end of the day, you’re going to feel good knowing you gave your best.

 

The end.

Those I Admire

My parents.

Day four is write about someone who inspires you.

That’d be my parents. For one, they’ve been married twenty-five and a half years, and have raised nine children together, and dealt with the death of their 10th, the youngest, and somehow still managed to make things work in this divorce-crazed world.

My mom is a pretty wonderful woman; caring, understanding, always willing to listen. She doesn’t yell, or raise her voice. She doesn’t speak in anger. She is a stay-at-home-mom, and for those who judge that, it is not easy. It’s constant work, and if you think raising two kids is hard, imagine nine kids. And homeschooling them. Imagine the laundry, the mess, the cooking- a live-in nanny, maid, nurse- name it, and a stay-at-home-mom does it. The difference between a career mom and a stay-at-home-mom is the career mom gets paid, and is away from her kids for 8-9 days a day, losing time spent with her kids. The real winner is the stay-at-home mom. (In my opinion…)

My dad is a pretty awesome man; he’ll bend over backwards to help someone in need. He worked two jobs (one full-time, one part-time) for a few years, and would come home, and all us kids would flock around him. Looking back, I know he was exhausted, but he still sat down and played with us. Whether it was piggy-back rides, or bike rides, he always made time for us.

Both my parents love and listen without judgment. They understand they have to let their children go and trust they raised us to do the right thing. They respect us; they have given, and continue to give.

They inspire me to be a better person. To be more like them both. They’ve helped me tremendously in becoming the person I am (the good part of me), they support my dreams.

I’m just glad I have them both, together. Not everyone has two wonderful parents, and I am incredibly grateful that I do, and they’re still together. I know they’re not perfect, nor is their marriage. But I had to choose who inspires me, and I chose them.

Dear Prolife Crazies

The letter began.

I know this may come as a shock to you so you may want to go grab a bible for some support… as long a women have been getting pregnant, they’ve been having abortions. You’re fighting a pointless battle. No matter if you out law it and bomb every clinic in the world, abortion will still happen. …Always has always will. Period. So really stop bitching over something that will never change. Please, use all that effort and fix something that can change, like world hunger, or the economy.

Love, Pro-Choice.” ~Jessica G.

A complete copy of what was written by this Jessica, who I have no idea is.

My letter in response:

Dear Pro-Choicers,

You said “pro-life crazies.” First off, I am not a crazy person for being pro-life. Yes, some can be kinda nuts. But um, so are some pro-choicers. You got some crazies pretty much on every side of anything, ya know?

Secondly “grab a bible for support”, some pro-lifers are not Christian, Catholic or of any religion really. While yes, most pro-lifers do believe in God, not every single one does. And some even get annoyed when God is brought up. You don’t have to believe in God or religion to know that abortion is wrong.

 Thirdly, it’s not a “pointless battle”. Every life saved is a win. It may be a never-ending battle, but we have small victories. Never give up in fighting for the unborn. Again, every life saved is worth the battle. 

 Granted, abortion even before being legal was happening. Much less though. And if we ban it, it will still happen. But much less. Yeah, there will still be abortions, but it won’t be abortion-on-demand.

 As for “use all that effort and fix something that can change, like world hunger” I can only say world hunger will always be around. We can try to fix it, but we can’t. It’s a fallen world, and we can try to feed everyone, but we really can’t. It’s sad, I know. It hurts thinking of all those starving children. We can try and feed them all, but we’ll never reach every single one. I guess you could call that a “pointless battle” as well. But we’re still gunna keep trying. Every child fed is a small victory.

 “Or the economy”. Huh…I thought our president Obama promised that for us.

Love, Pro-life

Please note the sarcasm in the last line.

 

Ok so, I know abortion is legal. I get that. But did you know that with the legalization of abortion child abuse has risen?

Did you know that it’s like 3% of abortions are due to hard cases (like, rape, incest, mother’s health/life and medical problems with the baby)? Which means 97% of abortions are due to pretty much the baby is an inconvenience. 97% of abortion is abortion on demand- meaning they have no reason for it. (Ok, yes every woman has a “reason”, but not the medical problems, mother’s health, or rape reasons.)

Did you know Planned Parenthood helps cover up sex trafficking?

Sometimes pro-choicers say that if you’re prolife you’re anti-woman- and if you’re a prolife woman you’re a woman trying to suppress women, that you’re pro-baby and don’t care about the women.

That’s not true. I am a prolife young woman and I am not anti-woman. And I do care about the women. I will not support their decision to abort, but if they do, I will not hate them. Because what is that really gunna do? Not much in the way of helping them.

I do care deeply about the unborn, but once they’re born I don’t simply not care. I hate hearing about little kids that are abused, treated like trash. It’s not right. But neither is abortion.

Abortion is not the answer to an unwanted/unplanned pregnancy. I would have to say the majority of women who have an abortion regret it. Some don’t for years, while others are so full of guilt they get seriously messed up. But either way, there is forgiveness if one has had an abortion. Unfortunately, there are those who will judge and hate. But I won’t.

Every abortion stops a beating heart.

All the above in italics is what I wrote in response to the letter addressed Jessica. In April 2011. I could just write something else, but I thought copying it would work, because even though it’s almost three years old, my stance is still the same.

See, I’m not some anti-women, pro-unborn, anti-baby nut. I care about the women- my heart breaks for them that they’re even in the position to feel abortion is the right option. I wish there was a home for every child. I wish parents would grow the fuck up and actually be parents instead of neglecting their children for drugs and alcohol and God knows what else.

So let us not judge someone by their belief just because a lot of people claim a title without knowing shit what it means.